"No regrets"....I've heard people say they live their lives with no regrets, and when I hear that, I understand completely what they mean. It is a philosophy I have held for much of my life. I believed (and somewhat still do) in the old standby of "everything happens for a reason". I am the one who will preach this to you whenever life is not going as planned.
Yet, I cannot help but take time to reflect on that comment. I regret a lot of things in my life and even though my mistakes shaped me into the person I am today, let's be honest....some things are meant to be regretted. For example:
- not talking to someone offering to be my friend. (I was too shy).
- not learning how to play a musical instrument
- never learning how to swim
- the letters I wrote to that boy in middle school (pretending to be someone else)
- cracking my knuckles and back as a youngster
- not waiting until I was married
- not keeping a secret
- keeping a secret
- cutting, dyeing, and perming my hair (over and again)
- being stubborn
- not sticking up for myself
- not going to college straight out of high school
- not trying hard enough
- giving in
- giving up
- not giving in
- not being in the right place, at the right time
- not knowing when to leave
- fighting with my sister
- buying the McRib just because it was the LAST TIME it would be sold (for the millionth time)
- throwing away my old diaries
- knowing why I threw them away
- telling on my sister for joy riding in our Aunt's car (she was only about 12, but it was really fun)
- not being able to hold my mother's hand as she took her last breath
- fearing the unknown....
Even now, when my life is about to change completely as I transition from being a stay-at-home mom for the last twelve years into a working mom and full time student...I know I am creating a few regrets.
We all do; Sometimes there is nothing we can do about it.
Yet, we can learn to give ourselves permission to forgive ourselves. Maybe not immediately, or even a few years down the line....just as long as we do, sooner or later.